TIPSY TIMES VOL 1
Welcome travelers to the first edition of
Tipsy Times
I'm Sir Issac, no relation to my brother from the love boat, but I do have a sexy mustache, and I'll be your vacation drink adviser. I offer my humble opinion to help you enjoy your libation experience while on vacation. As a sexy bartender I've served thousands of cocktails to folks looking to have a great time. I often run into those who don't have a clue of what they have a taste for when they step to the bar. For the gentlemen I try to find their liquor of choice then offer suggested mixers based on their taste buds. For the ladies I find out their favorite flavor and recommend a liquor to make me sexier!
Feel free to submit all your cocktail questions for my humble opinion. For mixed drink suggestions please let me know your preferred liquors, favorite flavors, sugar level, your "usual" drink of choice and any relevant information about your taste buds.
Dear Sir Issac,
I spent months losing weight so that I would look great while on vacation. I starved myself, worked out, and jumped on the wagon. I have so far lost enough that I will look good in my new outfits and evening dresses while vacationing in fabulous Las Vegas.
My problem is that I want to have a drink when I'm on vacation. I want to reward myself for all my hard work, but I don't want to sabotage my waist line either. I know that there is power in moderation but I don't want to calorie count at every sip. I like sweet wines, clear alcohols, sugary mixers, and most flavors are good except peppermint anything. My usual drink is the screw driver.
Help Me Keep My New Waist Line
Ohio
Dear Help Me Keep My New Waist Line,
Your man Issac is on the case--sexily of course. I'm sure you have put in hours and hours of getting those curves just right so let's not undermine your efforts. Lucky for you and me you like the clear alcohols. Alcohols happen to be free of carbohydrates so that helps in maintaining the new waist line. Alcohol does happen to have a few calories but you should burn those easily by shaking your booty on the dance floor.
HMKMNWL I recommend that you try diet cola (Pepsi or Coke) with a vanilla flavored vodka. The vanilla flavor of the vodka is a great compliment to diet or regular cola. Most bars only carry diet cola so getting your drink made everywhere shouldn't be a problem. Getting a sexy bartender like me will. This cocktail will tingle your lips with pleasure at every sip, but take it slow cause two or more will catch up with you fast. However, you’re a lady who likes a good screw driver so you probably can handle the vanilla fizzy ride. This yummy cocktail is sure to help you enjoy a guilt free Las Vegas vacation, or at least about losing your waist line to a few drinks. My advice is that what happens in Vegas probably shouldn't happen if you are scummy drunk--my opinion though.
Dear Sir Issac,
I'm tired of going on vacation to new bars and having to get doubles & triples just to get a serious drink. Before I know it I've spent $50 on five drinks that really is one or two at best. It's like some bartenders feel that they got to stiff the customers to make a profit. You would think that bars located in tourist areas would go out of their way to fully service the customer. I shouldn't have to ask for a more liquor when I'm paying $7 to $15 per drink! They know they have us by the short hairs because:
1, We are on vacation so we are ready to party
2, Who in the hell goes on vacation to stay in the room/house!?
3, We like to people watch while we listen to tunes
4,The bars are where we meet the hot single ladies
Oh yeah, I'm even more ticked off if I want to buy a lady a drink. I know that I got to get her two or three before I start to look like Brad Pitt.
Sir. Issac is there a guide to good bars while on vacation or is it just a crap shoot? I'd like to actually taste the liquor rather than watered down juice.
Please Give Me A Real Drink Damn It
Chicago
As a sexy bartender I usually never have a problem with my concoctions potency which results in happy customers. I feel the better I treat you the better you treat me. However, there are those who enjoy my sexy cocktails, spend all their money, and don't bother to leave me a decent tip. Not cool, I have just given them my all! They roll over saying "I'll get you next time Sir. Issac." Ah, ladies I do sympathize when you walk out with one of these losers.
My suggestion PGMARDDI and other lightweights like you, tip first. If I get mine first, I'll make sure you get yours the rest of the night. I'll even let you include that lucky lady for a threesome.
I have always admired the customer(s) who gave me my tip before they took one sip of my sweet libations. This tells me, "Sir Issac, I appreciate your craft and understand that you are very important in my goal to have a good time tonight."
You see, PGMARDDI, I'm the most important person in that bar, to be treated as an after thought is an insult. I assist you on your quest to gather courage to speak to the runway model sitting at the end of the bar. More importantly, I understand you need her to see you through margarita colored glasses to have a chance. If I'm treated as King then I'll ignore her blatant advances and remind her that you paid for her cocktail.
On the other hand, there are some wicked establishments that strictly enforce how much libations their bartenders can pour into a cocktail. I have never, nor will I ever work for such an establishment but they do exist. Some have bottle leashes to cut the flow off so that a bartender can't give you that little extra. If you walk into this type of bar I suggest that you get up and walk out. Most tourist places have more than one watering hole that will be happy to rock your world-if you treat them right. I believe those few bars that strictly shot pour and utilize the bottle leash should be banned from serving cocktails. Bartending is an art that is tied closely to customer appreciation. I can't excite my customers with my hands cuffed behind my back! Give me free pour or give me death!
PGMARDDI the next time you are at a bar try tipping your bartender before you order a drink. Give them a $5, $10 or $20 bill just to say:
1, I'm happy to see you
2, You are the most important person to my happiness in this place
3, You are so sexy (if its me serving you)
4, With your support I might get lucky tonight
5, You are my best friend
6, Dude, you rock, this is the best vacation ever
7, You might need to call me a taxi
8, No more, just water please
9, There is no place like home, there is no place like home, there is no place like home
10, I love you, I'm telling everybody to come see you, you da man/woman
PSA
Have a great time when you are on vacation. Remember to buckle up and don't drink & drive-it's not sexy.
Cocktails & Kisses
Sir Issac.
Feel free to submit all your cocktail questions for my humble opinion. For mixed drink suggestions please let me know your preferred liquors, favorite flavors, sugar level, your "usual" drink of choice and any relevant information about your taste buds.
Dear Sir Issac,
I spent months losing weight so that I would look great while on vacation. I starved myself, worked out, and jumped on the wagon. I have so far lost enough that I will look good in my new outfits and evening dresses while vacationing in fabulous Las Vegas.
My problem is that I want to have a drink when I'm on vacation. I want to reward myself for all my hard work, but I don't want to sabotage my waist line either. I know that there is power in moderation but I don't want to calorie count at every sip. I like sweet wines, clear alcohols, sugary mixers, and most flavors are good except peppermint anything. My usual drink is the screw driver.
Help Me Keep My New Waist Line
Ohio
Dear Help Me Keep My New Waist Line,
Your man Issac is on the case--sexily of course. I'm sure you have put in hours and hours of getting those curves just right so let's not undermine your efforts. Lucky for you and me you like the clear alcohols. Alcohols happen to be free of carbohydrates so that helps in maintaining the new waist line. Alcohol does happen to have a few calories but you should burn those easily by shaking your booty on the dance floor.
HMKMNWL I recommend that you try diet cola (Pepsi or Coke) with a vanilla flavored vodka. The vanilla flavor of the vodka is a great compliment to diet or regular cola. Most bars only carry diet cola so getting your drink made everywhere shouldn't be a problem. Getting a sexy bartender like me will. This cocktail will tingle your lips with pleasure at every sip, but take it slow cause two or more will catch up with you fast. However, you’re a lady who likes a good screw driver so you probably can handle the vanilla fizzy ride. This yummy cocktail is sure to help you enjoy a guilt free Las Vegas vacation, or at least about losing your waist line to a few drinks. My advice is that what happens in Vegas probably shouldn't happen if you are scummy drunk--my opinion though.
Dear Sir Issac,
I'm tired of going on vacation to new bars and having to get doubles & triples just to get a serious drink. Before I know it I've spent $50 on five drinks that really is one or two at best. It's like some bartenders feel that they got to stiff the customers to make a profit. You would think that bars located in tourist areas would go out of their way to fully service the customer. I shouldn't have to ask for a more liquor when I'm paying $7 to $15 per drink! They know they have us by the short hairs because:
1, We are on vacation so we are ready to party
2, Who in the hell goes on vacation to stay in the room/house!?
3, We like to people watch while we listen to tunes
4,The bars are where we meet the hot single ladies
Oh yeah, I'm even more ticked off if I want to buy a lady a drink. I know that I got to get her two or three before I start to look like Brad Pitt.
Sir. Issac is there a guide to good bars while on vacation or is it just a crap shoot? I'd like to actually taste the liquor rather than watered down juice.
Please Give Me A Real Drink Damn It
Chicago
As a sexy bartender I usually never have a problem with my concoctions potency which results in happy customers. I feel the better I treat you the better you treat me. However, there are those who enjoy my sexy cocktails, spend all their money, and don't bother to leave me a decent tip. Not cool, I have just given them my all! They roll over saying "I'll get you next time Sir. Issac." Ah, ladies I do sympathize when you walk out with one of these losers.
My suggestion PGMARDDI and other lightweights like you, tip first. If I get mine first, I'll make sure you get yours the rest of the night. I'll even let you include that lucky lady for a threesome.
I have always admired the customer(s) who gave me my tip before they took one sip of my sweet libations. This tells me, "Sir Issac, I appreciate your craft and understand that you are very important in my goal to have a good time tonight."
You see, PGMARDDI, I'm the most important person in that bar, to be treated as an after thought is an insult. I assist you on your quest to gather courage to speak to the runway model sitting at the end of the bar. More importantly, I understand you need her to see you through margarita colored glasses to have a chance. If I'm treated as King then I'll ignore her blatant advances and remind her that you paid for her cocktail.
On the other hand, there are some wicked establishments that strictly enforce how much libations their bartenders can pour into a cocktail. I have never, nor will I ever work for such an establishment but they do exist. Some have bottle leashes to cut the flow off so that a bartender can't give you that little extra. If you walk into this type of bar I suggest that you get up and walk out. Most tourist places have more than one watering hole that will be happy to rock your world-if you treat them right. I believe those few bars that strictly shot pour and utilize the bottle leash should be banned from serving cocktails. Bartending is an art that is tied closely to customer appreciation. I can't excite my customers with my hands cuffed behind my back! Give me free pour or give me death!
PGMARDDI the next time you are at a bar try tipping your bartender before you order a drink. Give them a $5, $10 or $20 bill just to say:
1, I'm happy to see you
2, You are the most important person to my happiness in this place
3, You are so sexy (if its me serving you)
4, With your support I might get lucky tonight
5, You are my best friend
6, Dude, you rock, this is the best vacation ever
7, You might need to call me a taxi
8, No more, just water please
9, There is no place like home, there is no place like home, there is no place like home
10, I love you, I'm telling everybody to come see you, you da man/woman
PSA
Have a great time when you are on vacation. Remember to buckle up and don't drink & drive-it's not sexy.
Cocktails & Kisses
Sir Issac.
HAPpY HOuR
Aloha! There is nothing better than hanging loose on any of Hawaii's beautiful islands. On my last visit to Oahu, Hawaii I had a chance to visit quite a few bars, clubs, and restaurants. It never failed that they asked me to get my sexy ass behind the bar. Flattered, I had to remind them I was on vacation to rest. Then I was offered a sexy tasty drink known as the Mai Tai (My Tie).
1 oz Light Rum
1 oz Dark Rum
4 oz Orange Juice
½ oz Lime Juice
½ oz Orange Curacao
Dash of Grenadine
Little Orgeat
My Sexy Mai Tai:
2 oz Light Rum
2 oz Dark Rum
2 oz Fresh Squeezed Orange Juice
½ Fresh Squeezed Lime
Dash of Orange Curacao
Dash of Grenadine
Prep:
Combine the ingredients, yours or mine, into a rock or highball glass over chipped ice. Give it a few stirs and garnish with pineapple and cherries. Enjoy!
The Mai Tai blends together the right amounts of rums and fresh tropical juices so that it doesn't fall into the fu-fu category. One too many Mai Tai's and it's stumbling along the beach time for you. I enjoyed my favorite Mai Tai at the Mai Tai Bar located in the Ala Moana Center. They garnished it sexily with a beautiful sweet smelling purple orchid. If you want to experience this tropical treat at home check out the ingredients to make your own. Mahalo Cousins!
THEY KNOW HOW TO MAKE A DRINK!
I would recommend my sexy self every issue but it's just not fair to the rest of my fellow cocktail concoctors.
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Meet Christie a sexy bartender at Harry Buffalo in Elyria, Ohio. She gave great customer service and served great cocktails to boot. Check her out when you're in town.
If you have a bartender that's the sexy bomb in your area please send me:
Name:
Location:
Likes/Dislikes:
Favorite Drink to Make:
Why They Rock:
A Cool Picture:
Permission Slip To Post
I'll make sure that all our travelers know to look them up when they are in your town. Sexy Cheers! Sir.Issac1@gmail.com
SAY WHAT?!
It is truly amazing the names us bartenders give our cocktails. We go through so much to create masterpieces only to give it a special name.
Introducing the Blue Mother Fu@!*r (Shut Yo Mouth) by way of Chicago
Taste: 3 sexy lip licks
Presentation: 4 sexy winks
Buzz Meter: 3 sexy hic ups
(Best out of 5)
Score: 13
Sexy-O-Meter: Hey Baby!
Ingredients: Light Rum, Tequila, Vodka, and Gin. Dash of Sweet & Sour, Coke and Blue Curacao
This is basically a dressed up long Island Ice Tea with a name Shaft would be proud of. One of the sexiest long islands I have ever made.
Travelers and Bartenders send me at Sir.Issac1@gmail.com your cocktails with the strangest names. Please include a photo of the cocktail, the mad bartender who invented it, ingredients, how the name came about, and where to pick it up. If you are confident that you make your creation the best then send specific creation instructions. Our travelers want to sample your wares at home. Who knows your sexy cocktail might catch on globally.
posted by WhyRentARoom.com at
4:01 PM
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